Pairing: Yoosu, cameo by Kim Jaejoong
Genre: Humor, mostly just straight up CRACK!
Summary: Whoever thought of the phrase, "Love thy neighbor" obviously never met Park Yoochun... lucky for them.
Park Yoochun and Kim Junsu have been neighbors for six months. And what a charming six months it has been. Kim Junsu, being the normally passive and serious business man he was couldn't say that he appreciated Park Yoochun's…well, life style. He wasn't a prude or anything… he had his fair share of wild times too. It's just that now, he liked to relax.
Park Yoochun on the other hand was what you call a playboy, a party animal. He liked to drink, throw loud parties that went on at all hours of the night, and he liked to play loud music at all hours of the day. That's just the way he was. He liked to have fun and live for the moment. Not that he was like that all the time… sometimes he slept.
It all started one lovely and peaceful night. Yoochun randomly decided to throw a party. Sure, it'd be his fifth one this week, but who's counting? But poor unsuspecting Junsu had no idea what he was in store for. This would have been the first night he had experience one of Park Yoochun's crazy nights. His plan for the evening was to relax with a nice hot cop of cocoa and catch up on some reading. Yep, those were one of Kim Junsu's crazy nights. Unfortunately for him, his wild and crazy relaxation and reading time was abruptly interrupted by the loud base of music pounding through the walls of his once quiet abode.
Well, it’s needless to say, Kim Junsu would have none of that. He would write a strongly worded letter to express his problems and send it to him tomorrow. Yep, that would sure show him. How long could the party possibly go on for anyways? No need to address it now, right?
Six hours later...
Kim Junsu was not a happy
dolphin man. After six hours of loud music, people yelling, beer bottles breaking, and the occasional naked person running by his window, the party finally seemed like it was going down. Kim Junsu had to wonder why none of the other neighbors, or anyone within an 800ft radius, didn't complain about the noise. That was until he saw one Kim Jaejoong, (another one of his neighbors) run half naked down the street. And that explains that. Junsu continued his letter.
Dear Park Yoochun,
This is your neighbor, Kim Junsu. We have never had the pleasure of being formally introduced but I think we've been neighbors for almost a month now. I can't say I know much about you besides that fact that you, well… like to have fun. I couldn't help but hear that you have thrown a party last night, that's okay, parties are fun! But I would very much appreciate it if you would be ever so kind as to keep the noise down just a tad and keep the naked people to a minimum. Not that I mind a good time every once in a while, but I found it just a bit hard to concentrate. So if you could do that for me next time, that would be greatly appreciated.sincerely yours, Kim Junsu.
After re-reading the letter about a dozen or so times until he felt he was satisfied and didn't seem too forward, he made his way over to Park Yoochun's residence. After stepping over a few beer cans, and passed out people on the front lawn, he placed the letter ever so neatly in the mailbox, not wanting to disturb him if he was already sleep. And with a satisfied smile on his face, Kim Junsu went to bed for the night.
The next morning he wasn't too happy to see a note stuck to his door with a piece of gum that read ever so nicely in a red sharpie...
Dear Kim Junsu,YOU SUCK!!!
Sincerely yours, Park Yoochun
Well, that certainly seemed uncalled for, especially the little note on the back that read, "p.s. You looked cute in your ducky pajama's last night." Now that was just plain awkward. Well now at least he knows a little more about this Park Yoochun, he's not just a jerk, he was a pervert too. And needless to say, Kim Junsu would not take this lying down. So he marched his perfect little plump butt still clad in his ducky pajamas over to Yoochun's to give him a piece of his mind.
Once again stepping over a few left over beer can's and some discarded boxers on Yoochun's front lawn, he made his way to the door and knocked loudly. His feet firmly planted in place, his hands on his hips, rant ready and prepared at the tip of his tongue. The door opened. Junsu forgot what he was going to say. There stood a shirtless Park Yoochun, all long-haired and tanned with a grin that just oozed grease and a body that screamed: "Imma-do-you-all-night-baby." Junsu's war stance loosened.
"And what can I do for you on this lovely day?" Yoochun asked, leaning a bare arm against the door frame and staring down at an adorably dazed Junsu.
"I, ah… you… you…"
"With the party, and t-the note. And the… the…"
At this point, our poor Junsu was completely and utterly flabbergasted. Having lost all the things he has so thoroughly planned on saying over the 40 second it took to walk over here, he couldn't make a coherent thought. The greasy grinning and shirtless Yoochun was definitely not making it any easier for him to form his thoughts. Junsu could tell he was enjoying this greatly as he saw the grin deepen on Yoochun's face.
Kim Junsu thinks Park Yoochun sucks and is a bastard.
"You suck and you’re a bastard." Junsu finally stated and crossed his arms over his chest.
Yoochun smiled again, all greasy and knowing and said, "Well, I will admit I do suck… pretty damn well I might add…" And Junsu was stricken speechless again.
Remember that time when he said he wasn't going to take this lying down? Well he did… in an entirely different way.
A/N: YAY~ I wrote crack again!!! Why is yoosu always my crack muse though? XD Oh well, I'm not complaining! Anyhoo, I hope at least some found this amusing! And yes, I know "Imma" is not a word umai_jai_ai! Well, I super, extremely, really, LOVE comments! I'm such a comment whore!!!! PLEASE~!!!! XD
On to ---> PART TWO! :D